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I haven't updated in a while...I just don't really care anymore.

I really needed someone to talk to after school today, thats why I'm updating now because there was no one to talk to. Drew wasn't home, Steph didn't answer, Phil didn't answer, Liz didn't answer, I even called Andrew J and he didn't answer either. I called Jaime and she couldn't talk.

I've been trying really hard to be ok. Today it was to much for other people to be happy and for me to feel so alone. I miss having someone with me everyday after school, I miss having someone to eat dinner with, I miss having someone to talk to at night. When I am looking forward to talking to my friend it is always ruined by knowing that I can't just talk to him by myself.

I don't want to do this anymore.

Current Mood:
rejected rejected
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School made me tired this week. I didn't like getting up at 6:10 everyday. I don't think anything exciting happened at school that I could tell you about.

This weekend we watched The Island and The Skeleton Key. They were both good and both very weird. Last night after we watched The Skeleton Key we looked up Hoodoo (that's what is was about) but we didn't find out that much about it. All I know is that is has to do with the practice of magic and it started in New Orleans (the slaves brought it over from Africa). I think weird things like that are interesting.

I've been working on a design for the senior mural. I didn't want to but only two people turned in a design so Frank asked me to make one. I don't want to do it so I hope Jessica's wins. Hers is cool, I like it.

Drew and Liz wanted me to go Ice Skating today. I don't ice skate. If I would have went you all would have had to visit me in the hospital because I would have hurt myself very badly. Since I didn't go they came and kidnapped me out of my house and we went over to his house so we could finish our movie.

I should be doing homework or something but I hate it so I don't want to.
Current Mood:
blank blank
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I cannot read a tale of two cities. It will kill me and I will be dead. I tried I really tried today and I just can't do it. It was going on and on about something but I had no idea what. I guess I missed that part. So I guess it's sparknotes for me, and that will do me no good so I guess I'm screwed!

New Years was good. I hung out with Grant, Steph, and Seth. I had to go to my families for a little bit. That really sucked. They make me mad.

I'm very sad that this is the last day.

Current Mood:
grumpy grumpy
Current Music:
Fiona Apple
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Christmas was good. On Christmas eve Grant came over and we did our presents. I love the things we get each other. Most of the things he got me were things I love but I would have never thought of. Me got me the prettiest pillow, really cool candle holders (there are three of them and each one is taller then the one before, I love them), a picture frame (those are my favorite), a bunch of stuff to make a still life for art. I thought that was the coolest idea. Theres a bunch of fruit and a bottle and a HUGE basket and cute little vases. He also got me this little box thing with a lid that I think I will put my lip gloss in, the book Deception point, lip gloss, cocoanut lotiony things, CARTOONS, the movie saw, one of the pictures of me that was taken at Roper(sp?) studios in a little frame, a lot of candy, the cup that I wanted and a pretty black bowl. OMG I didn't realize how much stuff he got me until I wrote it all down.

I didn't get anything to exciteing from my aunt and cousins. Lotion, candle, one of my cousins made me a scarf. My dad got me gift cards. I got clothes and games and other things from my mom. Stephanie Anne gave me this picture she took of Grant and I, a pink scarf and the perfume that I wanted REALLY bad. I smells good but it also has the coolest bottle. Liz got me warm weather, a necklace and earings, the movie Skeleton Key. Drew got me the I Love Lucy trivia game (I won!), Phil got me a pink bra (loooooooonnnng story), and Deedee got me bubbly bath that smells very good.

It was a good christmas!
Current Mood:
bored bored
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Yesterday I took a personal day. I laied around all day and did nothing. Well I helped with Reverb in the morning then Grant and I came home and had breakfast. My mom made us eggs and pancakes. Grant helped a little and he also made us hot chocolate. Then we played with my kitty for a while. After that we laied around until he had FFE. It was nice to just not do anything. We did hang out with Steph and Seth for a little bit after FFE. We tried to watch a movie but we were too tired. It was a good day and I liked it a lot.

Today I did some more christmas shopping. Now I have one more thing to get. I'm not really sure what that one thing will be yet. I don't really remember what I got for my mom either and I might want to get her one more thing.

I had really good ice cream on friday. It was peppermint ice cream with hot fudge on top. I thought it sounded kind of weird but it was very good. I want some right now. I suppose I could go get some but I don't really think I want to go outside.

The designs for the senior mural are due before break. I haven't even thought about it. I actually forgot about it until someone reminded me. I just don't really think I care. It will be a lot of work and I really rather focus on things for my portfolio then work on an ugly mural. I think they have all been ugly so why waist my time on another ugly one. We will see maybe I will find time this week to make one. I don't know if I will even be able to come up with any ideas.
Current Mood:
blank blank
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I really just wanted to go lay in my bed but I had to tell you all about my day.

Today I saw the Phantom of the Opera. That was my birthday present from Grant!!! I loved it soo much. I don't think I missed a part. I saw the orchestra man directing the orchestra, I even noticed that the people carrying things on stage were people in the show not stage people. When the chandelier when up to the ceiling and the they pulled the curtains off the stage I was amazed (that is the very beginning). I loved the lake part with the candles and the fog. I loved every second of it. I couldn't have asked for a better birthday present. No one has ever done something like that for me either...I'm just so happy that I don't even know what to say.

I kinda sucked today because I couldn't stop thinking about it long enough to hold a conversation. I didn't say much on the way there because I was so excited, and on the way home I was thinking about it and I had such a bad headache :(

Thank you Grant ~hug~
Current Mood:
indescribable indescribable
Current Music:
The Phantom of the Opera
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I love my friend Grant Morrow!!! For my birthday he is taking me to see the Phantom of the Opera! I wanted to see it soooo bad and just a few days ago I was so depressed because I didn't think I was going to get to go. I'm so excited! It's the best present! Oh and we are going on Sunday! I really am sooo excited about this, I have never seen an actual musical. I have only seen them as movies.

I also love Miss Stephanie Anne! She got me a gingerbread house maker thing and I get to make one. I have never ever made one and I'm really excited about that too. She also got my the Jessica Simpson stuff. Smell good stuff you can eat and it smells soo good and it tastes really good too. She also got me a Nickolas Sparks book and a dvd of the Lucy Show. OHHH and the cutest pen ever!

Did I tell you yesterday about the ring my dad got me? I have a pretty ring that goes with my pretty necklace!

Andrew made me a cake for my birthday. He brought it to FFE and I let everyone have a piece. It was really good cake and I couldn't believe the frosting, he made really pretty edges like a cake from the store.

Now I'm going to have my birthday with my mommy.

I love my birthday and I love all of my presents and I LOVE everyone who thought about me on my birthday. You are all the best
Current Mood:
ecstatic ecstatic
Current Music:
The Birthday Song
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My birthday party was tonight (my birthday is tomorrow!!!!!!) and I had lots of fun. All most all of my favorite people were there. Stephanie Anne, Sethie, Drewy Pooy, Philly Phil, Deedee...and MY FAVORITE BOY! He is the best. It was supposed to be a surprise but a few people told me but that is ok because it was fun and I loved it anyway. Grant bought my dinner, Seth bought me a cake. Deedee got me this funny book called PMS Warnings. Her and Drew wrote some funny things in it. I like it a lot. Drew got me my movie, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and I have already watched it tonight! Grant got me this really cool vase thing and these cute kitties that I love and I know just what I'm going to do with them. He says I get my BIG present tomorrow. I'm excited.

Tomorrow is my birthday! I will be 18. YAY

Current Mood:
excited excited
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Today was Mrs. Metzgers birthday. Grant and I made her cupcakes and I am so proud of us. They actually turned out good!

My birthday is on thursday. I will be 18. It didn't really seem weird until today, just a little bit ago. I will be an adult on thursday.

I was impulsive today and I got my hair cut and I colored it too. You can't really tell it's a different color and the cut isn't exactly what I wanted but it's ok.

Current Mood:
cold cold
Current Music:
Fall Out Boys
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I have major mood swings and can be very bitchy! I started being a bitch yesterday.

I hate being at home. I was painting tonight. I think if I would have been somewhere else I wouldn't have gotten so upset but I was here and I hate it here. I was sooo mad. Please no one ever get me a paper cutter. If I could cut a straight line then I would have cut my painting into a much smaller piece of paper. Nothing was working right and I just kept getting more and more frustrated. I really don't get like that unless I'm at home. I know when I was working on it last time there was a part of it that was gay but I wasn't going crazy like I did tonight.

So I gave up on it tonight. I want to get it done before Sunday because people are going to be looking at my portfolio but if I'm going to be like this every time I work on it then I'm not so sure about that.

Current Mood:
pissed off pissed off
Current Music:
Mary - Scissor Sisters
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